Closure
October 27, 2007
It just so happened that an informal MM center party was held at the big HUB on the same day Nova had its big d-day. Thoughts aside about the whole bankrupcy protection, it was a great party.
A lot more people came out than expected and I got a chance to thank and say goodbye to many people. It was a great rowdy night and I didn’t even drink a drop of beer! I made a realization that after tonight there would be a lot of people I would never see anymore and some people I might accidentally run into on the streets. I didn’t speak with my friends too much knowing full well I would see them, just as often as before.
For me it was closure to a fairly big part of my life in the past five years. I left quickly, abruptly, and definitely not publicly. Some people didn’t know I had quit since so many people were on “holidays” or were “sick”. Today, I was able to have my say with many good people that I will miss.
Thank you everyone. �疲れ様���.
D-Day
October 26, 2007
This is a huge day. Nova has filed for bankrupcy protection, ousted the president, and suspended operations. This is it.
Just on the news – the Hello Work office in Umeda has set up a counseling service for Nova employees. Enjoy!
Housewife
October 24, 2007
It has just been a week since I quit my job and it has just been a week of fun and games! It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to do whatever I want everyday for any extended amount of time.
So far I’ve been to one interview that I felt wasn’t as spectacular as I had hoped for but I’m hoping I’ll get a second interview. I’ve played a couple of Llorwyn sealeds – it’s a very nicely themed set with beautiful art. Some of the mechanics I don’t care for so much though. I’ve been hanging out and had a few drinks with various people.
5 packs of Llorywn and the pile that goes with it
Any level of stress I had has completely disappeared. I’m not sleeping very well though – I’m trying to stay up late but I can’t sleep in anymore. The early shift has broken my ability to sleep.
As most of you already know, I’ve been addicted to facebook.com. Seeing those little messages and that friend number go up little by little is quite satisfying. Now though, the friend count has lost steam and should I want to see the same kind of growth, I’d have to dig into the seamy past. Eww.
I’ve been taking my camera out wherever I go and trying to bike more around Osaka. I can’t believe that I didn’t bike so much before. I’ve missed out on strange shops and neighborhoods. Pictures will follow I’m sure.
Those in Japan: Da Ole HUB this Friday after 7pm for an informal MM center get-together!
It’s finally done
October 16, 2007
Today was my final day at Nova.
The bunny that fucked us all over
I decided yesterday that it was finally time to end this chapter of my life. Today I submitted my notice, had my holidays arranged, and said my goodbyes.
As expected, the amount of sick calls skyrocketed this week and today I essentially had a full schedule of lessons. It has truly been a long time since my last full-lesson day. I enjoyed each lesson and had good chats with some of them. During the whole time I couldn’t help but run through all five years and think about all the people I had met and interacted with.
I am very fortunate to be able to walk away from MM with only positive memories. Although I’ve seen my share of crap there, I have let it go and will truly remember my experience as one of learning and cooperation between people from so many walks of life.
I said goodbyes and thank yous to many today but my favorite was LS superstar Yumi. She was so shocked by the sudden news that she started crying a little! I didn’t know how to respond. I was touched that someone would have such an emotional response to my leaving.
I have no idea what the next few months will hold but I am very happy about starting a new chapter. My time at Nova has been wonderful and I sincerely hope that all instructors and staff will be able to come out of this with an experience as positive as mine.
The only original core group instructor from when I first started AND my meat shield
HFK! And/or Mr. Squigg Voice
Who could ever forget Billy Bastard?
My boss, the one who lets me run rampant
A few more pictures.
The End
October 13, 2007
I’ve always refrained from writing about Nova for a lot of reasons but the crazy roller coaster ride that has been happening over the last couple of months has helped change my mind.
I am a Center Trainer (CT) at Nova. That’s equivalent to a Branch Trainer (BT), the next step above an Assistant Trainer (AT). At work I wear a dark green tag to differentiate us from the light green ATs, and the purple instructors. Just to let you know now, the colors mean nothing and really, the positions don’t exactly mean much neither. It is and always has just been a job. I hope I can say without a lot of people flaming me that I’ve always tried to keep it real. I never carried the “company line” and always called it as I saw it. I almost never gave bullshit to anyone and the times I did, well, those fuckers must have been really out of line.
I feel the end is nigh and I’m just about ready to close this chapter of my life.
So just a quick overview of the past couple of months:
- Japanese and Foreign staff (ie. permanent, salaried employees) had their salaries delayed each month since July.
- Titled Instructors (ATs, BTs, CTs) and many regular instructors outside of major cities had their August pay delayed for two weeks in September.
- Instructors living in apartments subleased by Nova have been evicted because Nova did not pay rents (the rent was deducted from instructor salaries).
- Branches have been closing all over the country – hundreds of schools are done.
- Rumors of a lot of people quitting in gaiji, payroll, everywhere “higher up”.
Just yesterday the useless president sent a fax to all branches saying that our salary on the 15th will be delayed until the 19th. This refers to ALL instructors now, across Japan. This will be the final straw.
This morning I woke up early and contacted LS (the administrative area at the MM) and confirmed the contents of the fax. Already then, I was told of 20 sick calls and this was at 6:40AM. I can only imagine the chaos happening right now as hundreds of branches across Japan will be unmanned and hundreds of lessons being cancelled. This will only continue all week until there’s nothing left.
Surprisingly, I am not at all angry right now. This has been expected and in fact, I’m looking forward to the end so that I can finally move on and start something else. When my salary was delayed last month, that really caught me by surprise. I didn’t think it would ever come to that because the instructors are the company’s final line. I was completely shocked that they crossed it. Now, the end is all but inevitable – it will be drawn out and ugly but I am glad.
I do want to say that I have really loved working with the people at MM over the last 5 years and 4 days (not that I’m counting). Many have become excellent friends and I have learned a lot from them and my position. The experience I gained working with people will last and I’ve made a fair bit of coin as well.
To friends and family back home, you need not worry about me. The lady and I have funds saved up, she’s still working, and hopefully I can get unemployment insurance in a timely manner. I have held out on job applications because there are literally hundreds of people applying for the same jobs right now. I am applying for the couple of jobs here and there that really appeal to me and skipping out on the crap. Worst comes to worst, I can bunker down and enjoy a bit of a holiday.
I’m on my weekend but I will be going in on Monday because that’s our scheduled pay day and technically they can still pay us on that day. I am planning to go in on Tuesday so that my pay will “officially” be late and also I will help out LS staff as much as I can. Wednesday… let’s leave Wednesday optional for now.
If anyone at Nova has questions feel free to contact me and I’ll try to answer them if I can.
Kiyomizu-dera
October 05, 2007
I went with my new buddy Gerard to see Kiyomizu-dera; one of the more beautiful and famous places in Kyoto. That temple sits on the side of a mountain and some of the structures are over 1200 years old!
The lack of updates is intentional. I have been going through a tough time at work. I’ll keep it brief but last month my salary came two weeks late and the company always seems to be on the brink of bankrupcy with staff salaries having been late for months now, teachers being evicted from their apartments because the company has not paid the rent, advertisers not having been paid, and branches being closed.
This has led to a mass exodus of teachers all over the country and floods of rumors coming in every day. The company has not exactly been forthcoming with any news. This is the worst part – being kept in the dark when motivation and confidence is at an all time low.
I am not having a fun time at work. It’s like climbing a mountain everyday just to get there and climbing it again to stay. I have some plans but basically I’m going to ride it out and try to get on the dole.
Nova handed suspension order over tuition fee practices
June 14, 2007
From Mainichi yesterday. Thanks fearless leaders. Rest assured that my confidence in you is not as low as the stock price. Thanks.
Nova handed suspension order over tuition fee practices
Nova handed suspension order over tuition fee practices
The Ministry of Economy, Trade and Industry on Wednesday ordered major English-language school operator Nova Corp. to suspend part of its business operations for holding back money from students who cancelled their contracts, ministry officials said.The ministry issued an order prohibiting Nova from soliciting customers or accepting applications for contracts exceeding one year or new contracts exceeding 70 hours. The suspension will be in place for six months.
It is the first time for the ministry to issue a business suspension order to an English language school under Japan’s special transaction law. People who are currently taking lessons at the language school will not be affected by the order.
Ministry officials explained Nova operates a system in which students buy points enabling them to take lessons. When they buy a large number of points in advance, they can take lessons at a cheaper price.
However, when people cancelled their contracts before finishing their courses, the company lowered the amount of lesson fees it returned to them. In addition the company didn’t inform people about the procedures for canceling contracts.
In April this year, the Supreme Court ruled that Nova’s policy of demanding penalties when students cancelled their contracts violated a law regulating commercial practices. It said the policy restricted students’ right to initiate the cancellation of their contracts, and ruled the practice invalid.
It has also emerged that the company prevented students from canceling their contracts under Japan’s “cooling off” law which states that people can cancel contracts without any obligation if they do so within eight days of forming the contract, by listing students’ contract day as the day they took tours of classes or received explanations about lessons.
Furthermore, when inviting students to take lessons, the company advertised that they could book lessons any time they wanted, but because of the difficulty in securing teachers, it remained difficult to make bookings. Because of this, the ministry reportedly decided to issue a business improvement order to the firm.
The Ministry of Economy, Trade and Industry and the Tokyo Metropolitan Government conducted an inspection of Nova in February in connection with the law regulating commercial practices. It found that several practices that violated the law had been ordered by the company’s general headquarters. The ministry said it judged the company’s practices to be “organized and malicious.”
Nova operates over 900 schools across Japan, and has about 480,000 students. Since 1996, the National Consumer Affairs Center of Japan has received over 7,000 complaints and inquiries about the company. (Mainichi)
(A) would make me very happy
June 07, 2007
Me: “I am now asking you to stop playing Sudoku in lessons.”
Dumbass: “How am I supposed to stop from falling asleep?”
Me: [choose your answer].
Possible answers that I wanted to say.
A. “Take your right hand, make a fist, and repeatedly hit your orcish-looking face with it until you reach skull, or through skull.”
B. “Sign your name on this sheet of paper called Resignation Form.”
C. “Step onto a highway blindfolded. Wear black clothes and do this at night if necessary.”
D. “Choose another guy to give lip to.”
Congratulations dumbass, you’ve made my list.
Exploding Gyoza
May 31, 2007
A term coined by Guillaume, Exploding Gyoza becomes the very first episode of Dumbass Chronicles, a new category I’ve decided to add to my blog.
Yesterday at work, our first ever dumbass decided to heat some food in a plastic container in our new microwaves at work. They were literally installed that morning.
She decides to heat up this tiny plastic container for 10 minutes.
The plastic melts, the food is set aflame.
As I walk up the stairs to the standby room, I see the room filled with white smoke and several staff members opening doors and turning on air conditioners trying to help clear the air a bit. I work for the next hour or so in the office, eyes becoming sore, throat becoming irritated, anger and disbelief enveloping my common sense.
Because of this dumbass’ ability to realize that exciting water molecules in a small plastic container will melt it, super heat the food so that it bursts aflame, the microwaves have now been temporarily suspended from action, resulting in 700 people not having access to the microwaves. Thank you, dumbass.
Use Your Common Sense
April 16, 2007
The death of fellow Nova teacher Lindsay Walker sparked a big media response in England. It got the attention of media in Japan as well and the company had to release public statements and also internal memos relating to the case. The suspect is still at large.
A new article on Mainichi has a few anecdotes of private teachers and students having terrible experiences with creepy assholes. I don’t doubt that these stories are real and/or there are other similar stories like them.
To all foreigners thinking of coming to Japan I only have these words: use your common sense. To all students learning English from foreigners: use your common sense.
It is true that Japan’s crime rate is very low compared to most western countries. I feel very safe when walking at night in dark alleys. I think people are more scared of me than I of them since I always walk like I’m about to mow someone over. Regardless of this, use your common sense.
Don’t walk around at night alone. Don’t visit the homes of people you hardly know. Don’t leave your valuables unattended. Don’t go out with your students/teachers (whatever happened to professional distance). Don’t let someone touch you or if they do, raise hell and make sure they pay for it. Don’t sleep with someone unless you have the same idea of what kind of relationship the other person wants. (Trust me… there are some scary scary stalking / angry girlfriend stories).
Do let someone know where you will be. Do meet students/teachers in public places. Do get references or ask to speak with other students/teachers that this person is teaching/was taught by. Do be on guard.
Foreigners have a bad name in this country because of the actions of a few dumbasses. Having met my fair share of them I can only hope that the image of our countries isn’t tarnished too badly. Trust no one. The truth is out there. United we stand. Divided we fall.
I concede
March 20, 2007
I’ve met my match.
Up to this point I thought there was no one I couldn’t train. No one who wouldn’t demonstrate a semblance of teaching after spending a few days with me. I would never officially admit it but the majority of those I get from the beginning do alright for themselves.
Wrong!
I have met one who goes beyond words. I had never been so helpless at work. I literally sat down and just stared into nothingness because I had no game plan. No corrective feedback, no training module to run through to fix something or to improve something. I had never been so stressed at work because I thought it was me! It was my training. I was doing something, or NOT doing something that was causing this.
I sent for reinforcements.
I had a few experienced trainers who spent time with said person going through stuff we did. This is personal time that is generally not given at this point in teaching. Mostly, it’s group work with me and the other trainees. Even after individualized, personal time, it wasn’t enough. At that point I realized it wasn’t me. It was, said person.
I’ve met my share of terrible people at work. Mostly it comes down to attitude, holier-than-thou personas, always blaming something else, or just plain angry people. Unfortunately our test subject did not fit any of these templates. This was something brand new.
The best word that comes to mind is “thick”. What we do is not brain surgery. What we do is a simple skill that can be acquired. What I expect from those I train at this point is the bare minimal. Our test subject was unable to meet most goals at the end of training, something I had not personally seen in my trainees until now.
Our test subject had no attitude problems. However I cannot say our test subject was personable neither. Quite the opposite – a blank sheet of A4 paper comes to mind.
I’m sorry for being so vague on everything. It would just be plain mean to name names and go into details. I’m not stressed anymore because as of 3pm five days ago, my obligations to our test subject were done. It will just remain a blemish on my otherwise unspotted record.
You win.
Business Trip Excursion Activity
November 28, 2006
Today I tasted full privilege from being in lower middle management, or middle lower management depending on your perspective. I, along with a few others, got to visit a hotel in Osaka and administer level check tests to different hotel staff the entire day. Compared to my usual day at the office, this was like a trip to Disneyland.
I adorned my company pin for the first time ever, put up my best face, and slicked my hair up for this. I was rather surprised that several of the people I met had been in Vancouver. Two of them even studied four years of college. One of them became visibly excited when I told her I was from Vancouver. It was like she had met a celebrity while I just sat there and stared at her rather strong reaction.
This has been one of the most interesting days of work ever. Back there tomorrow too!
Not my fault
November 22, 2006
OK let’s give this whole updating biz another shot. One thing that’s always bugged me about people is that there’s this percentage who can’t own up to their own faults. When approached about any sort of negative feedback they blame external factors. It seems like in their mind they themselves could never be wrong, could never do wrong, and ergo, it’s someone else’s issue.
Jeez it feels like deja vu writing this. I’m sure I’ve written about this before but I’m too lazy to make a quick search through the archives.
The biggest problem with this percentage of people is that it’s not their job or the people around them or their surroundings. It’s them. They generally are their own enemy. Because of this inability to acknowledge self weakness, they isolate themselves from the world. The characters I have in mind now are notorious for being difficult and no one wants to deal with them.
The second biggest problem and this I can only assume is that if I think I’m never wrong, then I assume that I have no need to do anything different and ergo I will never improve. I will continue going along my path because, well, it’s working right? The ones I have in mind will suck, forever, until they realize they need to wake up and smell their ineptitude.
I, not being a hypocrite, will acknowledge that perhaps I am wrong in this view. There’s always the remote possibility that everything I need to pass on to them is not their fault. Even so, if it were me I would at least fathom the notion that I may have done wrong and acknowledge future care to prevent the matter, even if I’m sure nothing was done wrong. But that’s just me being crazy.
I am a fireman
May 21, 2006
I am a fireman. For the past two years I have been putting out fires big and small, quickly and efficiently, using minimal resources. I’ve taught other people to become firemen and damn good ones too. I’ve written manuals on being a fireman, given presentations on firefighting, and if I were to toot my own horn further, I would say I drive the damn firetruck pretty well too.
As a good fireman, as long as the supply of water kept coming, I had no fear of ever being a less effective fireman. Sometimes I had surplus water that I could give to less fortunate firemen. Sometimes I would use surplus water to prevent future fires. It was a damn fine time for fire prevention.
Sometime last year the taps were sucked dry. I didn’t have enough amounts of water to fight all the fires I usually do. I had to ask for water supplies and ration everything. Here and there we were able to take small amounts of water too. As such, I spent more of the water on putting out deadly fires, emergency fires, and very little on preventing fires. Times were tough for all of the city’s bravest. Most, including myself, thought it was just a drought; a seasonal dip in water supplies, but after such a long drought I think even the most naive are beginning to doubt the water level and our ability to fight fires.
Well as if things weren’t bad enough, soon, water rations will be even more scarce than before. There will be no point in looking for water because even the ponds and puddles are drying up. Forget about official water rations because they’re giving out those tetra pack juices to fight fires. Now, we have to hold buckets outside and hope and pray for rain which certainly does not come everyday.
Obviously our fire fighting ability will be severely hindered. I’m hoping the fire chief is not expecting the same amount of fire prevention. No one, not even a firefighter as good as me, is able to exponentially increase efficiency with such a reduction in resources. The good old days of fighting blazes is over. At best we can put out birthday candles and sparklers.
If the city bitches that there are too many fires then I think my days of being a firefighter will be over.
Children at work
November 06, 2005
Take a look at my picture. Do I look like your fucking mother?
When I go in to work in the morning I find empty bottles, half-drunk coffees, newspapers, magazines, scrap paper, and all variety of junk in the booths. This pisses me off to no end. I find myself thowing more of other people’s junk away in a day than I throw away from my apartment in a week.
What kind of asshole leaves their garbage in a booth? What kind of asshole can’t be bothered to bring their garbage they brought in to the garbage can that’s no more than a 10 second walk away? I know the answer: these assholes are children.
Children don’t clean their rooms. Children need their screaming mothers to harass and threaten them to do their chores and put away their toys. Children don’t have the discipline, nay the common sense and courtesy to put their shit in a fucking garbage can. Therefore the assholes who do this at work are children.
I’m not the only one to be pissed off by this. A fellow in my group came to me and said, “You know I think trainers should try to enforce the rules more and get people who leave garbage in the booths”. I completely disagree with him. I am not their fucking mother. It’s not my job to make children do their chores. It’s my job to ensure development and training and evaluations and enforcement of policy. There is no policy that says, “Don’t be a fucking child”. If I have to make sure these children throw away garbage, then I should be able to discipline them like mothers. I should be able to ground them or take away their TV privileges or abuse them with chinese feather dusters (ahhh… memories). “Don’t be a fucking child” is an implicit policy that should be written into the constitution or the ten commandments or be permanently etched on these idiots’ foreheads.
Here’s what I’m going to do. I am going to find out who these assholes are. I am going to collect a bundle of garbage and I’m going to stuff it into their lockers. If their lockers are already filled with garbage which I suspect is the case, I will find a time and stuff the garbage into their backpacks and then take a piss in it.
You can litter in your apartment all you want. When you enter a place you share with countless others, don’t be a child; put garbage in its place… asshole.
A Sign At Work
October 21, 2005
Mike’s evil finger warning me. Too bad. The furniture and the tatami mats are really delicious.
Play the game
April 28, 2005
I give people the benefit of the doubt. I think people will do good if left to their own devices. Sadly, I’m always let down by some.
Unfortunately for all, my company has set arbritary rules that punish the group for the misbehaviour of the few. I’m certain this is not isolated – I’m sure companies do it all the time. As part of my duties, I am to reinforce and uphold these rules. I personally think most of them are ridiculous but it is my job and I will do it.
It’s very easy dealing with me. All I need from you is to hear the words: “You’re right Jerry, I won’t do it again. I’m sorry.” I’ll even take, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know about this rule but it won’t happen again.” Say the words. Let me hear them from your lips. Maybe there was a good reason for the situation – explain it to me: “Sorry Jerry but this happened because (reason).” Whatever it is, I don’t care if you’re bullshitting me or if you’re sincere. Say the words and I’ll be out of your hair. Just don’t do it again. When I’ve walked away, feel free to laugh and joke about what a crock of shit you just said. Doesn’t matter, it’s all about the delivery of those words.
It helps to be respectful. I show everyone a certain level of common courtesy – all I ask for is for you to show me the same level of courtesy. Again, I will give people the benefit of the doubt but when people respond to my courtesy with rudeness, sarcastic remarks, or just stupid responses, it ups the level on my part.
It’s a game. It’s just a fucking game. Like every game, there are rules. Play the fucking game, follow the fucking rules. Simple as that. It’s not worth standing up to make a minor point. It’s not gonna pay off to make smart-alecky remarks when I’m still within earshot. No matter how stupid a rule is, it’s still part of your fucking job – you agreed to abide by company rules.
Some others will be vindicative and find twisted ways to extract “revenge”. I won’t. I don’t have the time for it because I’m swamped with work. You’re not worth my effort. I will however remember you on my ‘list’. When I choose between two people for something good – one of whom I don’t know and one of whom is on ‘the list’, I will choose the one not on ‘the list’. When I need to give something bad to the same people… who do you think I will give it to? I’m not being vindicative – I’m being normal. I will treat those whom I like better than those I don’t. Being a sarcastic prat isn’t going make me like you better.
Sigh. Sometimes I think it’d just be easier if I were to treat everyone like shit. Fucking principles get in the way.
Starstruck
April 26, 2005
Today I had the pleasure of teaching a rather famous person in Japan. I don’t speak Japanese so well but having the toob on most of the time to break the silence really gets me into the entertainment world. I know this famous person is on TV pretty much everyday in a commercial or variety show. It will be my claim to fame (after being the voice in some of the lessons). In all honesty, I was rather starstruck for this lesson. I haven’t been nervous like this in a long time. For someone so well respected in the entertainment industry, she was really down to earth and a lot of fun to speak with. She did great!
For my nihongo-capable friends, here’s her official site – you may recognize her.
Teaching in Japan
March 09, 2005
I’ve been getting some more emails from readers off the internet asking about Japan, teaching in Japan, or traveling in Japan. I’d be more than happy to answer questions if you’ll kindly ask specific questions. Please, no more “I’m going to Japan. Any advice?” messages. Here are some things on my website that may answer some questions too:
- My email exchange with another person who was coming to teach in Japan.
- My writings in the Japan category – it’s a big mix of stuff. Sorry, at this time there are no subcategories yet.
Alright. Nihon de mimashou!
Work
November 01, 2004
Let me set the tone of this update first so that you can have a reference point.
I’m writing because I’m forcing myself to write. I really don’t want to write again because, quite honestly, I haven’t much to say. My writing this update is akin to my washing the dishes. It’s not fun but it has to be done.
I think I’ll write about work tonight. In my 7 months in this position, I am looking at work through two eyes: the eyes of the instructor, and the eyes of the company. Unfortunately, these two sets of eyes do not always (pardon the pun), see eye to eye with one another. However, this dual vision helps me everyday in making choices about correctional choices to take with instructors or how far to defend an instructor.
One matter that’s been peeving me of late is the amount of work people do. Last month I had the busiest single month ever at work. On top of a rather unheard of number of observations, I also had my foot in a few other projects, and assignments. No matter. I am one to take on challenges. I did all the work with nary of peep of complaint. (I only mentioned my workload to my buddies as a rather personal lament but never to those in positions to evaluate). What do I see at our little round table sometimes? People with zero workload. Yes. They have literally nothing to do. To their credit, they offered their help but sadly, I had work that only I could do. Oh well. Hopefully what comes around goes around or whatever that shitty saying is.
Next matter. The instructors. They lack the company eyes. That only have instructor eyes. These eyes are very near sighted. They see what they have to do. They see what their peers have to do. They get used to not having to put in full effort each day and they bitch. They bitch like highschool children. “Why did I get 6 lessons when John had 5?” They get paid to do 8. Sometimes their complaints are genuine but most of the time, I try to ignore all the ridiculous complaints that come out. Quite frankly, many of them haven’t put in a hard day’s work in their life. I’m rather sick of seeing people my age and sometimes older act like children. When I was in their position, I did what was asked and swallowed it. I lost nothing by doing my job. I gained nothing by complaining.
Eep. OK before I go off on a crusade and wipe out the whiney babies at work, I’ll end here. Maybe it was good to get that off my chest.
2 More To Go…
February 15, 2003
Here I am, in booth 479, waiting for an intermediate student to show up for a vocabulary lesson about The Media. It’s four minutes into the lesson and no trace of him has surfaced. Maybe though, I will hear the static-like crackling of background noise that always precedes the student’s entrance.
The event horizon is about seven or eight minutes. If they don’t show up within this time, chances are they won’t show up at all. Before this time though, no light can escape the fact that they might pop up and force you to teach.
It is eight minutes and 30 seconds… NOW!
I’m in the pseudo-safe zone but still I fear. I fear he will break the intensive statistical analysis done by me and other’s before me. This set of vocabulary lessons, for example, has a 10% no-show rate. This rule of thumb has held true for me. In fact, my numbers have even outperformed the norm.
11 minutes…
I breathe a heavy sigh. It’s too late to do a complete lesson for most students now. By rational logic, this student would not come because he doesn’t want an unfinished lesson. Yet I have learned that our world isn’t always rational and logical.
15 minutes…
“Don’t be an idiot,” my brain whispers, “Don’t let your guard down just yet.” Others before have gone mad when their student(s) show up at this point. Even normal curves provide room for outliers. Judging by his profile, he doesn’t quite fit in the area between 2, maybe even 3 standard deviations.
20 minutes…
I’m half through now. Luck or fate has helped me this far. Please don’t forsake me now. Many a teacher have been abandonned by Prima Donna Luck. In their valiant crusade to secure the coveted Three-Way-No-Show, it’s when all 3 students don’t show up, one student will almost inevitably show up. I myself only have had a 7 minute, Three-Way-No-Show. I almost tasted divinity. We have all heard the legends of the forefathers who have felt this glory. The new and therefore naive young ones look forward to one every new day. I personally have gone beyond despair for one. No. Not for me. Not today.
25 minutes…
I begin to see a small, white light at the end of this proverbial tunnel. I’m on the home stretch now but it has been known that shit can happen. They could show up. They have the ability to do so. They paid for this right, this right to torment us. Fire feels like the finest down and brimstone tastes like the sweetest fruit compared to this anxiety, nay, this agony of The Wait.
30 minutes…
The naive would’ve taken off their headsets: our lance and shield at this point. Not I. I have fought off enough foes to know that they attack when you are weakest. These naive fools would be surprise-attacked. They will scramble to equip their lance and shield as the cunning foe launches waves and waves of broken English.
35 minutes…
I’m taking a big risk. I checked off the no-show box. It’s equivalent to planting your flag in the enemy’s backyard. They could show up now and you’d have to unplant your flag and uncheck the box like the coward and fool you are. It takes balls to check it now. Only a few minutes remain. The light in the tunnel is filling most of the darkness.
40 minutes…
The familiar bell sounds. It trumpets a triumph that will ring for all evening. I had a No-Show. Score one for the white knights.
—
Thus is the life of an English teacher.
Nyahhh
November 07, 2002
Ok, I will not just put up links today (not that there’s anything wrong with link-only-updates). The links are right before this update.
So yesterday I saw my friends and we went to a funny little restaurant that served all kinds of food. In Japan, most restaurants specialize in one food so if you step into an udon shop, you can only literally order udon (several different kinds of udon though). It’s not like Vancouver where you can get spaghetti, steak, quesadilla, and (pshh) chinese stir-fry in the same place. The restaurant we went to was pretty good but most of the time was spent just having a couple of beers and playing janken for whatever food was left. I lost several times so I got stuck with the fourth round picks and a piece of lemon. Bah. I am craving a gianto plate of good ol fashion spaghetti. It’s the easiest thing to make but there’s no incentive for me to go buy the stuff and spend half an hour cooking. I’d rather go to the convenience store and pick up some sandwiches or o-nigiri for half the price and a tenth of the effort. Anyways, I digress. I haven’t seen one girl since June, one guy since July, and another girl since October. They were pretty high level English speakers and they also stayed in Vancouver for well over a year. When I was in Vancouver, they had no problems speaking English. Yesterday was probably one of the first few times they’ve had the chance to practice speaking so their levels were quite low. It was an hour into dinner and a couple beers downed before they were speaking more naturally. It’s not that I’m judging or anything, it’s just made me think you have to keep practicing something just to keep where you are. That sucks because I enjoy a whole variety of hobbies and therefore I will not have the time to practice and therefore I will never be good at something. Sucks to time constraints.
On a happy note, today I understood a woman when she was asking for directions. I even pointed her in the right direction (she was lucky I recognized the train line). I am such a divine gift.
I am running on 4.5 hours of sleep again. It will be like this every Thursday since I work at 7:30am. This shift sticks out like a sore thumb because I usually sleep at 1 or 2am every night because I usually work at 3pm. I do feel I accomplished a lot in the day though. I just can’t wait to get my hands on them monies that were promised.
Mega Update
October 30, 2002
In the three weeks I have been in Japan, I wrote a makeshift diary in the hopes that when I got internet, I could put it on my webpage. Here it is folks. There’s only about 4 updates but it’s about 4 pages in length. It’s for you if you really love hearing me whine and crap like that. Enjoy. Remember, I’m still waiting for your emails.
The last update ended on October 19. Since then, I’ve done nothing but work and relax with Eri. There.
October 11 – 16:00
I am guilty of not updating this webpage as of late but I’m sure you’ll forgive me of this. Right now at this exact moment, I am sitting on some tatami mats in my “living room” in my apartment in Osaka in Japan. I am alone because Eri had to go to school. About two hours ago, I walked her to the train station near my house and kissed her goodbye. I had eight hours to kill before I would meet her at the train station again. I walked through the station and saw some sort of market place. Actually, this was the first time I was alone in Japan so decided to bring out the adventure-seeking qualities in me and plowed into the marketplace. The marketplace itself looked like a really long alley with a cover. To each side are ragtag stores with ragtag store keeps. I couldn’t help but notice that the average age of the store keeps must have been near 60. There were many food stands with real Japanese food. My palate was beginning to grow accustomed to the food here so my saliva glands began working. I continued on. There were not many clothing stores and the rare ones there mainly sold women’s fashion. I saw many stores that sold a variety of goods ranging from home appliances, kitchen goods, stationary, and traditional looking items such as pots, kimono, strange statues, and the like. I ended up buying 4 forks, 4 of those Chinese spoons that we use at home, and 2 soy sauce dishes. Total cost: 1,000 yen or for those unaware of the exchange rate, about 14 dollars. I think I’m going to return to this 100 yen store (the equivalent to the dollar stores we love so much). That wasn’t it. I took a long way home (on purpose!) and found a grocery store where I poured about $30 in 4 bananas, 2 oranges, 4 cans of coke, 2 Nagasaki Champon packs, and a ready to eat meal of tonkatsu and rice. Did I mention things cost more here than they do in Vancouver? As I walked back, I heard a bunch of men speaking in a somewhat hostile manner. I recognize the tones and phonetics in the few yakuza movies I’ve seen. From what I can gather, some construction workers weren’t happy at some guy in the apartment that they were working at. That’s all I could tell you without learning the language. So here I am in my apartment now, recapping my adventurous day. I feel somewhat bored without Eri and a little homesick. I really like my apartment though. It’s a little old but the place is bigger than I imagined and after a huge cleanup day yesterday, the place is looking alright. We need to buy a lot more things before it becomes a fully functional unit.
I miss you all dearly and wish I were home for a day.
PS. The following is a recap of my first two days here. Enjoy!
—
After a 10 hour flight that was delayed for an hour and a half due to “technical difficulties” (said the Captain), I was exhausted. I valiantly traded my seat with some Chinese gentleman because his two young daughters had seats together with me and I guess they didn’t want to be apart from daddy. I gave him my seat and took his. This sacrifice would end up costing me because I ended up sitting beside a fat lady who took up about 2 inches of my seat and a 90 year old man who wouldn’t stop talking to me. I had to answer in lies because if I told him the truth to his questions, they would lead to more questions. “How long will you stay in Japan?” he asks, “One month, I’m just going siteseeing”, I say. If I said I would stay for a year, he would follow up with what I’m doing, and would go on and on about some anecdote. He did speak and read Japanese very well which was surprising.
Anyway, some guy from the company picked me up and he was as cold as the Ross Shelf that broke off not long ago. He told the other suckers, I mean recruits which train to take and someone would meet them on the other side. I bet they ALL got lost. I got a break because I happened to live in the same building that he does. In fact, he’s living right under my place, wonder if he hears my key tapping. After a VERY long train ride and a very long walk to the building, I finally got into my apartment. There was a wood smell that was a little intrusive. I dropped my bags, de-virginized the toilet and ran to the nearest payphone to call Eri. She and her mom picked me up soon after and we spent the next few hours buying stuff for my apartment. I stayed at their house that night.
The next morning, we got up bright and early and went back to my place. Eri, being the angel she is, spent the whole day helping me clean out the place. The place looks so much better after the cleaning. It’s actually quite a comfortable flat. We then went out to do some more shopping and we came home exhausted after hauling several bags and walking several thousand kilometers.
The weather so far is nothing but outstanding. It was 25 degrees out yesterday while today is 27. I hope it stays this way until I get used to the whole shebang.
October 12 – 11:00
Good morning! While Eri is just finishing up a shower, here I am writing a morning update! Last night was possibly the best night of sleep I’ve had in over a week. I slept from 1:30 to 7:00, then 7:30 to 9:30. That’s the most continuous sleep at ‘normal’ sleeping hours I’ve had since about one week before leaving for Japan. I’m feeling really at home in this new apartment and already took a dozen pictures of the setup and whatnot. Some bad points of this place is that there’s really no sink for brushing teeth so we have to use the kitchen sink. There’s a shitty mirror hanging in front of it too. Also, there are quite a few cockroaches around too. I’ve seen 4 small cockroaches and 1 giant one so far (all dead now?). Today, Eri’s mom is taking us out to lunch and then we’ll do some more shopping for stuff we need. It’s so barebones here that it’s not funny. We were sharing one cup (my ELI Mug!!!) until I decided to put our chopsticks and cutlery inside it instead. Those bananas and oranges really hit the spot for me because after eating them yesterday, my body suddenly felt revitalized. The oranges tasted more like grapefruits so I’m wondering if they were some sort of orange/grapefruit hybrid. That’s it for now.
October 13 – 10:00
Phew. Yesterday we ended up going from 12:30 until 22:00. It was a very long and tiring day. We went to another house they owned that no one lived in and brought over a dish cabinet. The thing was fuggin heavy. I live on the third floor without elevators too. We bought a lot of stuff again and even doubled the size of our bed with some clever use of an extra blanket and some rearranging. We are going to buy a couch soon which means we’ll have extra snuggle space and also if sleeping area for a guest or two (hint hint). We still have much to buy but the place is slowly getting there. I never knew playing Sims for real is so much fun. We have these catalogs which I can only describe as their version of Ikea only you fill out a form and they deliver the furniture to you. It’s a lot cheaper than actual retail stores but I guess the catch is you don’t get to see it or feel it until it actually comes.
Today we have free time that will be used for grocery shopping, relaxing, and directional gathering (for me). I start work tomorrow (doh) so I’m going to enjoy this day good.
October 19 – 23:30
Forgive me dearly for I have not written in nearly a week. What a week it has been! I started work, survived training, and had my first real day of work today. It has been an ongoing struggle of ups and downs and will probably continue to be so for another week or two. The first day at work was mainly just an orientation. There were only two Asians in the room of probably about thirty. Quite frankly, it was kinda intimidating. The other asian dude looked like he was going to jump out of his suit if someone so as much said “boo” to him. I didn’t talk to him. I met a few of the people I would work with there and had a free lunch. They basically lectured to us about the thrills of working there and some things we should be aware of while in Japan. Informative but depressing. At that point, I had a pretty low opinion of my job. Then came three days of training. The first day was quite horrible as they made us teach an actual lesson to a Japanese member of staff. Although I worked in an English school for nearly three years, nothing prepared me for the panic and anxiety in that lesson. Luckily, her English level was quite high so it wasn’t too bad. The next day, they made us teach 2 real lessons with real students. They were horrible too. There are some steps that we should follow in a lesson and I ended up fucking some up. Oh well. The third day was alright. I had a really good lesson and two not so goods. We got feedback about the past three days of training and I was kinda disappointed at my results. I felt this job sucked ass. At last, I got a day off. Eri and I didn’t do anything except get lunch, clean up the place, and watch some tv (actually, I just played baldur’s gate? I don’t actually “watch the tv” anymore). Today was the first real day of work. On the schedule were 4 lessons and a tiny bit of training. I was pretty much on my own this day and for all its worth, it turned out pretty well. I think my lessons were quite fun and I don’t have that sinking feeling when I’m watching the seconds tick away to the lesson.
For those who don’t know, I work at Nova – the largest English school in Japan. I work at their multimedia centre which is essentially an online English course. Each student buys a camera/microphone deal that they plug into their tv and they just connect to our server at specified times and learn. It’s a little easier for me (compared to other newbies) because I’ve been using computers since 386′s were around and Eri and I teleconferenced practically daily. I just had to learn what button does what and it came as second nature to me. Phew. I only have to worry about time constraints and whether or not I look like a buffoon or professor.
I noticed I miss Vancouver quite much as of late. It’s the simple things like getting a coffee with good friends or making fun of my sister or making some joke with old mumsie. I miss the ELI a lot, a lot more than I expected. It goes to show how people can affect your life.
I have a phone now! Message me for the number and a thorough explanation on what codes and such to use. I ordered ADSL (12Mbps!!!) and it is scheduled to arrive in about 2 weeks. If you’re reading this, then I guess it came through. I’m probably sleeping while you’re online most of the time.
Tonight Eri went home to sleep because the next day she has some test and it’s just closer for her if she stayed at home. It will only be the second time I slept alone in my apartment. I gotta say, it’s getting quite comfortable here. It’s a lot of work cleaning and washing dishes and cooking and worrying about gianto-ass cockroaches, but it’s MY place and I’m glad I’m here (I still miss you guys though). So, I will go enjoy some fried rice (courtesy of Eri’s mom) and then play some Baldur’s Gate, and then hit the sack, err, hit the futon mattress. Cheers.
