Coming out of my shell
March 30, 2006
In my three and a half years in Japan, I’ve been out to restaurants for dinner with friends an uncountable number of times. On the other hand, I’ve been to maybe 5 or 6 people’s houses for dinner. In Japan it’s not common to entertain guests at home as most homes are too small for more than a small or casual dinner. Even so, having people over for dinner does happen, just not very much for me.
A few weeks ago, the lady and I were invited over for dinner to her coworker’s house. Along with this being a rare event, this was also one of the few times I’ve been invited to anything involving the lady’s friends. It’s weird but we’ve generally kept each other out of our social lives. I agreed mostly because I was curious how it would go and because this friend had come to Hawaii for our wedding.
The friend and her husband don’t really speak English. I bet they understand more than they let on but I was ready for a night of me being quiet and just nodding and smiling. I figured I’ll behave so that the lady would have a good time. For this one occasion I was wrong (a true rarity). I actually ended up having a great time, possibly a better time than the lady.
For one thing dinner was awesome - the lady’s friend must’ve spent awhile preparing so much food. I also got to have okonomiyaki at someone’s house for the first time ever and it was good. The beer never stopped flowing and it seemed for one night and one night alone my Japanese ability blossomed and I was able to understand and be understood most of the time.
The lady’s friend’s husband (I really have to start using names) was a crazy fellow who opened up and let loose conversation. In stereotypical Osaka-style, he displayed a flair for exaggeration and colorful antics. People in Osaka are just ��?�?�ゃ interesting. It was great because he filled every silent moment. No need for me to go scrounging around for topics to kill awkward moments - he did it for us! We stayed a bit later than we had planned but I’m glad I went.
Now I feel obligated to return the favor and for once I actually DO want to return the favor. And I think we’ll try to start a new trend of not just spending time with each other. We’re moving into a new apartment in a fortnight and this time we have room! I am hereby inviting all of you to future social gatherings here. No parties, shindigs, keggers, or beerblasts, but there’s room for nabe, okonomiyaki, yakiniku, tea & coffee, darts, and Mario Party parties.
The Wedding: Behind The Scenes (4)
March 26, 2006
Tuesday, January 24 - Thursday January, 26
And finally I was able to spend time with my new wife on Tuesday onwards. It was the first chance for us to actually relax and enjoy this trip together. We did a lot of shopping, mostly for other people. I hate to say it but I got re-acquainted with a good friend called cable TV and enjoyed the king of all delicacies: a cheese pizza.
I like being pampered
The locals on the island were really friendly and talkative! A few waiters gave their life story a friendly reply to “How’s it going?” One cool fellow preceded all speech with “Sounds like a plan”. Entertaining and enlightening!
On a walk on the beach we ended up at the aquarium which made this big giant deal out of coral being made of living organisms. After the aquarium I was so sick of hearing it that I defiantly declared that coral is really a natural mineral. The beaches were a wonderful contrast from concrete in Osaka.
The aquarium had these information phones instead of a real tour guide
We didn’t spend as much time on the beaches as I would have liked but we did get some sun. I think I reflected more sunlight back into the sun than the beach absorbed. I also think this was the second time in my life where I’ve seen palm trees growing. I could easily get used to them.
Look closely! That’s no monkey climbing up the tree!
And to cap off a great trip, we got upgraded into business class. I am definitely going to spend extra or use frequent flyer miles to go for the upgrade. I’ve tasted luxury and I want more. I must admit the turbulence on the way back made me whimper like a little girl though and the shitty movies didn’t help.
When we were back in Osaka, a part of me was glad but the rest was yearning to be pampered in hotels and restaurants. Hawaii, we’ll be back!
The lady thinks everything is cold
And that was our week in Hawaii! Here are all the pictures.
You think you have it bad
March 21, 2006
Read this story about a child bride in Afghanistan and then re-evaluate your life. I dare you. I will never complain about my childhood again.
I don’t like this kind of photography
March 18, 2006
Last Wednesday was a day of firsts. It was the first time I visited a hospital for my own well being today. Before I dive in let me backtrack a bit.
For the last month or so I had been feeling a dull pain in my chest, around the breastbone area. I quick search online and along with other symptoms I had been having there were chances of it being GERD, an ulcer, or esophageal cancer. None of these are very fun things to be afflicted with, especially the last one, since my grandmother and the lady’s father succumbed to it.
So it was off to the hospital today to get a checkup. It was the checkup to end all checkups. I have never taken so many tests since my second year of university (7 finals in less than two weeks!). And because I am an attention whore and I have no shame, or maybe I want to educate the masses so my worries will not be felt by others, here are the gory details!
Don’t say I didn’t warn you:
Read it all…
The Wedding: Behind The Scenes (3)
March 14, 2006
The third day in Hawaii was with my family. Daddy rented a car and Victor was the pilot. For some reason he thought it would be a good idea to make me the navigator. Well I wasn’t going to tell him how dead wrong he was but oh well. We did some exploring around Waikiki and Honolulu but mainly did a few touristy things.
Chinatown
If two streets slapped together counts as a Chinatown, then yes, this was a Chinatown. If selling the same crappy ‘Chinese’ wares like fake jade statues, two dollar paintings and plastic slippers count as a Chinatown, then yes, this was a Chinatown. If reconstituting frozen food with equal amounts of MSG counts as a Chinatown, then yes, this was a Chinatown. I’ve seen better.
This sign made up 5% of Chinatown
Pearl Harbor
For some reason I thought it would be a giant “They surprised attacked us so we don’t like them” place but luckily I was wrong. It was an educating experience for many. For me, I’ve read history books already. Really, standing on the memorial doesn’t give you any extra feeling as only chunks of the Arizona are visible. The movie (Tora! x3, not the one with Ben Assface) and the gallery were much more informative.
On the boat ride there
Diamondhead Crater
A fairly minor hike that even my parents could do it was a nice escape from the touristy streets of Waikiki. I spoke with a nice lady from Johannesburg who was there for some research conference. At the top I snapped some nice shots of a rainbow shining into a valley.
The people of whom I have genetic ties to (Victor excluded)
The perpetual rainbow
Our hotel is the building next to the pink glob in the middle
The rest of the day was spent driving around, eating, shopping at the big mall (I need my books and video games damnit), and listening to my family bicker amongst themselves. It was good to be with them after so long again and good to catch up. I should really get on this Skype thing that everyone’s been talking about.
Our Wedding: Behind The Scenes (2)
March 09, 2006
Sunday, January 22
Eri’s makeup lady came fairly early in the morning and morphed her into wedding mode in only about an hour. For me it took ten minutes to change and get ready. After getting ready we got into our limousine to take some pictures by the beach. The photographer spoke a strange combination of English and Japanese. Regardless of his language ability though the pictures we got look damn good. Just being around a pro let me pick up a few tips for my own picture-taking ability.
A quick shot in front of our hotel
The lady on the beach
Finally it was off to the chapel. We got there earlier than everyone else and were quickly rushed into the minister’s office. There we got a crash course on the ceremony. Screw rehearsals, we watched yet another video and were told to basically relax as there would be people there giving us hints and stuff along the way. The minister came in and had a quick chat with us. He was a really nice fellow who radiated kindness.
The ceremony itself went without a hitch. Kenny the ceremony photographer was damn good as well and also let loose a rather annoying, but entertaining personality during the picture session. It was a rather tiring process being led around and being told where to go, when to stand, when to sit, when to smile, when to take the lady’s hand, when to look up up down down left right left right (B A select start) and while I would never forget it, I was glad when it was over. I bet that sounds horrible to some of you but I don’t need some two hour procession to prove to anyone how I feel for my lady. I just hate formalities when really they mean nothing compared to the big picture.
It was pretty cool to be in a limousine. I had never been in one before save for the small cadillacs that take people from airports to hotels. This was a stretch limo and let me say, I can get used to it. Our driver was an old Japanese man who kept talking to us. I was so tempted to close that window that separates the driver from the passengers, you know, like in the movies. I just didn’t want him to stop the limo and make us walk in retaliation.
We had our lunch banquet at a nearby reception hall. Food was actually pretty good. I couldn’t help but feel rushed as the waitresses and the lady in charge kept dropping us hints like, “Yes the food is finished now” or “Yes the taxis are waiting for your guests”. OK OK lady. Let me enjoy a few more moments with my friends!
Later on that day I got to spend a fleeting moment with Dennis at the bar with my other chums. Not realizing it at the time but Dennis is probably the longest running friend I have. What is it now, 12 years?
People I barely know
That night for the first time ever, both our families got together for a nice dinner at the Top Of Waikiki revolving restaurant. Service was dismally slow but surprisingly the prices were rather reasonable
Anyway, still later on that day I spent the evening with the lady and we’ll just leave the details out. (We had sex.)
Nijikai / Second Wedding Party
March 06, 2006
We had our 二次会 (ni ji kai) party last night. It’s a second wedding party generally for friends and for people who couldn’t come to the ceremony or who weren’t invited. We had slightly under 50 people come and celebrate with us. It was definitely the biggest party ‘we’ have ever thrown.
We took over Tiara restaurant and bar for a few hours and had a rather formal/rigid party. The night included:
- A candle lighting ceremony - the lady and I came out of the secret hiding place as the night formally began and lit candles placed on every table
- An opening speech by a very dear friend
- Cake cutting and champagne toast
- Two hour open bar - way too short although Thomas seemed to have no problems.
- A buffet dinner - the lady and I didn’t really have much time to eat so I snuck in as much food as I could in the very few minutes between greeting and thanking people for coming
- Prizes - a portable TV, an mp3 player, a webcam, a blender, an ICOCA card of an undisclosed amount of money, and a small bottle of icewine
- Enough well wishes and thank yous to last me a few years
I felt bad for my guests because I felt everything was so rushed. I wanted people to have plenty more time to enjoy the food and drinks but the restaurant basically swept us out. Everyone paid a fairly hefty bill to be there too (not to mention bags of presents and stuff; some of this shit’s good shit). I also felt bad because of the number of people there and because we were pretty much trapped to our table to greet people, I didn’t get to spend much time with people from my side. Such is the tradition of a nijikai party.
Afterwards about 30 of us headed over to a nearby bar for the, you guessed it, 三次会 (san ji kai) / Third Wedding Party. Thankfully this is not formalized and structured at all. We got drinks and this time I could spend time with my side more although my gaijin friends had mostly left.
We had guests come from Tokyo, Osaka, and if we’re being technical, Canada, America, and Australia (Osaka for these people really). I couldn’t believe some people took time to come join us last night and I’ll be forever grateful. The sad part was we both wanted to invite more people but had to trim our list down to the restaurant capacity. A few Komazawa friends sent flowers to the party and I wish they were there.
I mentioned this was the biggest party ‘we’ had ever thrown and the ‘we’ is wrapped in quotes because we had help. The lady’s two friends and my buddy Laura helped coordinate everything and act as MC, reception, waitress (for us), fashion adviser, forgotten-things-reminder-er, and more. Undying gratitude goes out to them. They took a lot of time out to help us plan and run the party.
Now that all wedding formalities are done, only the final things are left - things like sending out thank yous and all that fun stuff. I don’t have many pictures from this event so I’ll be knocking on your door if you had a camera there. Thomas wrote his account of it although he was a bit tipsy - he has a couple more pictures.
