Growing Up
November 28, 2003
One update. That’s it.
Anyway. Do you remember the day you changed from being a child to, dare I say, a man? There are basically four stages in a life: kid, awkward kid-adult, adult, old fart. Life as a kid was sweet. You go to stupid elementary school where you’re heads over everyone else because they were just stupid. All that fun reading you did at home at night really paid off – you knew more about everything than everyone else. Best of all, you were cute because you were a kid – there are no such things as ugly kids.
Then one day, you grew up into an awkward kid-adult. You know the phase – you’re too smart and ugly to remain a kid and yet you’re too short, stupid, and rash to be an adult. You went through highschool hating every single minute of it. You guaged the stress and happiness meter by the number of zits on your face at any given point of time. You gawked at every human that did not carry a penis and wish you could have intercourse with them. You wonder why everyone got girlfriends while you’re stuck at home playing stupid video games and listening to your mother bitch about you not vacuuming the living room or something. Life sucked ass.
Thankfully, that phase ended and even though it ended painfully, well, who gives a fuck. The worst was over and now begins the living. You’re an adult. You’re legal. You’re kosher. You’re cool. Whatever you’re doing, it’s cool. By now you’re grown up, filled in, cleared up, a little wiser, a little more handsome. You might even have had some action or done some pretty cool shit. It’s all good. This is when you just do something you don’t like for a very long time, get some money, and hope the damn neighbor’s dog doesn’t shit again on your lawn. Look out world!
Old fart entry is empty because I don’t know my shit yet about this era.
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I can pinpoint the exact moment of my life when I ceased being a kid-adult and became an adult. I remember it felt as if the delicate chemical balance in my brain had suddenly shifted and the tides had turned for rationale and maturity. I hated my teen years, there were so many things I did and did not do that I would love to change. There were so many people I liked and disliked, talked to and ignored, respected and looked down on, and all that. Looking back now, 99% of all that didn’t make any difference in the long run. The long run for me only ended with about 2 paragraphs of real lessons learned.
As an adult, I suddenly found myself a fountain of wisdom that I could tap into and also share with loved ones. Wisdom comes from experience and I think I’ve had my fair share of experience. I’ve seen a lot of shit that I wouldn’t hope on my worst enemy. I remember also noticing how even though I had become an adult, not many people around me had done so… early bloomer maybe? It’s been a few years down the road now and a lot of the people have caught up but there are still a couple who were left behind. You can easily tell who passed or not – it’s in their actions and words, in fact, it reaks from their body.
As and adult, I learned how to love, how to learn, how to grow, and how to let go. A lot of extra layers like caring what other people thought of me, or trying to keep up with others on something, or imitating the successes of others were suddenly shed, like the dried out exoskeleton of a tarantula. A lot of wild and untamed energy suddenly became subservient to my will. It was a matter of control I guess.
If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then my friend, you were left behind.
Friday
1 day weekends suck.
I stare at this empty space at blogger and I’m trying to fill it with wonderful words to entertain my visitors but I’m sorry: you get nothing!
It’s catch up time soon and I’m just pooped.
