I just noticed that my last two updates were written in the year 2000
January 07, 2001
Vacuum Cleaner Saves Man Chokes on Rice Cake
TOKYO (Reuters) – A vacuum cleaner saved the life of a 70-year-old man when it was used to suck out a rice cake on which he was choking, local officials said on Saturday.“His daughter used the vacuum cleaner to suck out the mochi,” a local official in the northern island of Hokkaido said.
The sticky mochi, made of glutinous rice, is traditionally served during New Year’s in Japan, but it can be lethal to elderly people. Every year the Japanese press has reports of elderly people dying from eating mochi during the holidays.
The government this year issued a special warning on the dangers of mochi for the elderly and very young.
While the vacuum cleaner successfully sucked out the mass of mochi, the official cautioned that it is not an accepted way to dislodge such items.
“Although he is all right, you have to be careful since such actions can harm your intestines,” he said.
If you or anyone you know is suffering from anorexia, consider buying a leaf blower and stuffing the barrel with a potato or other high energy food products. Aim into throat and turn on blower at full power. Keep blower on at half power after potato has left the barrel at high velocities. Should the anorexic want to vomit the food, the leaf blower will just blow anything back inside. True cure. I’ll sell you this anorexia cure for $399.95 (includes blower, 1 bag of potatoes, and instructional booklet). Order today.
